you succeed
where words
fail
to define
the shape
of laughter
and the form
of happiness.
signs
absence
blank
spaces
rift
void
elegy
tears
pain
forgiveness
strength
sunlight
peace
blackness
absence.
blank
spaces
rift
void
elegy
tears
pain
forgiveness
strength
sunlight
peace
blackness
absence.
me
spiraling,
spinning,
staggering,
splitting
atoms and
fibers and
seconds and
moments
saving,
resurrecting,
reviving -
the waning,
dying,
falling,
disappearing
me.
spinning,
staggering,
splitting
atoms and
fibers and
seconds and
moments
saving,
resurrecting,
reviving -
the waning,
dying,
falling,
disappearing
me.
alphabet of eroticism
in the light of my thirteen-year friendship with monette, i would like to share this with all of you. i remember us meeting in starbucks in araneta coliseum one fateful day (which was march 26th 2006) to plan for the next tattoo we both will be getting (and that was the psalm 91 tatt). i am unsure if it was the caffeine or the excitement or the lack of sleep, for that matter, that paved way to this...whatever the reason was, we sure did enjoy being in each other's company that day, as we always have, until now.
A - afterglow
B - barenaked, bump
C - cramps, carnal
D - debauchery
E - erotic, exotic
F - fingers, fluids
G - g-spot
H - haywire, hump
I - intimacy
J - jackhammer
K - kama sutra, kinky, kiss
L - lust, lesbians, lingerie
M - marquis de sade, missionary, meat
N - nymphomania
O - orgasm
P - pleasure
Q - quivers
R - ravaging
S - seduction
T - temptation, touch
U - unveil, undress, uncover
V - vagina monologues
W - whisper
X - xerex (?)
Y - yearning
Z - zeal
this post isn't for the faint of heart or for those under 18. skip this post if you are underaged. ahaha.
A - afterglow
B - barenaked, bump
C - cramps, carnal
D - debauchery
E - erotic, exotic
F - fingers, fluids
G - g-spot
H - haywire, hump
I - intimacy
J - jackhammer
K - kama sutra, kinky, kiss
L - lust, lesbians, lingerie
M - marquis de sade, missionary, meat
N - nymphomania
O - orgasm
P - pleasure
Q - quivers
R - ravaging
S - seduction
T - temptation, touch
U - unveil, undress, uncover
V - vagina monologues
W - whisper
X - xerex (?)
Y - yearning
Z - zeal
this post isn't for the faint of heart or for those under 18. skip this post if you are underaged. ahaha.
after
more than a song or a sonnet, more than
a thought or a feeling, your silhouette
devours the calm, impenetrable delight of
this soul, seeking clandestinely shards of
days you intend to give with your hands
shedding the night once forlorn with
envy and loss, you face the sky and the rain
is suddenly haunted by a cadenza
formed by your obscured breath and sigh
this poet left with an elegy that
forbids other languages, the senselessness
of sleep in your wake arouse and amuse
my senses filled with the awkward,
unexpected pandemonium that comes
after loving you.
for calliope
a thought or a feeling, your silhouette
devours the calm, impenetrable delight of
this soul, seeking clandestinely shards of
days you intend to give with your hands
shedding the night once forlorn with
envy and loss, you face the sky and the rain
is suddenly haunted by a cadenza
formed by your obscured breath and sigh
this poet left with an elegy that
forbids other languages, the senselessness
of sleep in your wake arouse and amuse
my senses filled with the awkward,
unexpected pandemonium that comes
after loving you.
for calliope
question and answer portion
for those who really, truly know me...they know how much i love q and a's. i saw this list from a book called 'inspirability' by pash a couple of weeks ago at national bookstore in harrison plaza.
here's my take on it:
NAME: teresa salvador
HOMETOWN: pasay city, philippines
TURN ONS: intelligence and humor
TURN OFFS: body odor and insecurity
FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD: my imagination
FAVORITE TOY NOW: my cellphone
LANGUAGES YOU SPEAK: filipino and
english
3 OF YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES: good will hunting, the silence of the lambs and malena
3 OF YOUR FAVORITE BOOKS: the alchemist by paulo coelho; cien sonetos de amor by pablo neruda; the catcher in the rye by j.d. salinger
IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE: mind reading
IF YOU'RE NOT IN THIS BUSINESS, WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING: i'd be either a writer or a shrink
MOST INSPIRED STATEMENT, HEARD OR SAID: 'i shut my eyes in order to see' - paul gaugain
here's my take on it:
NAME: teresa salvador
HOMETOWN: pasay city, philippines
TURN ONS: intelligence and humor
TURN OFFS: body odor and insecurity
FAVORITE TOY AS A CHILD: my imagination
FAVORITE TOY NOW: my cellphone
LANGUAGES YOU SPEAK: filipino and
english
3 OF YOUR FAVORITE MOVIES: good will hunting, the silence of the lambs and malena
3 OF YOUR FAVORITE BOOKS: the alchemist by paulo coelho; cien sonetos de amor by pablo neruda; the catcher in the rye by j.d. salinger
IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE: mind reading
IF YOU'RE NOT IN THIS BUSINESS, WHAT WOULD YOU BE DOING: i'd be either a writer or a shrink
MOST INSPIRED STATEMENT, HEARD OR SAID: 'i shut my eyes in order to see' - paul gaugain
the joy of pain
last tuesday, december 8th, i finally saw my best friend since time immemorial - monette. nosh and i were supposed to meet her around 8am but my sleeping habits got in the way - i woke up inexcusably late. so we ended up having brunch instead of a decent breakfast. the funny thing about setting up a meet in starbucks paseo de roxas is that there are three starbucks branches in that stretch alone. so you can just guess the confusion and what ended up being a 15-minute wild goose chase.
after brunch, we hailed a cab and went straight to recto, manila. i don't even remember the last time i was in that place. not much has changed - there's still a lot of people, the pollution worsened (i think) and national bookstore in avenida is still alive! i like going to that place because you can really find a lot of good books there - which, for some reason, makes me think not a lot of people in that area likes to read.
anyway, the very reason we went there is because nosh and i have been itching to get a mandala etched on our back. it has been two years since nosh last had a tattoo and almost six months for me. and i tell you, nothing excites me more than the idea of paying someone to inflict pain on me (i don't care if that particular statement did not come out right. you are all free to take it any which way you want to ahaha).
we met ding fernandez, tattoo artist extraordinaire. he was highly recommended by monette (and has done three of her five tattoos) so i figured this is the best time to try the merchandise (the merchandise being kuya ding ahaha). the studio's squeaky clean. as someone who digs the art of tattooing, the very first thing i check is just how clean the place is. nothing to worry in that department, he's a member of philtag and has won numerous awards in various competitions including the most recent dutdutan festival.
before i sat down to get my tattoo, i had to kill the nerves and went down for a quick smoke - which translates to a cup of coke and three cigarettes. it is an odd and funny thing, to still feel the jitters each and everytime i get inked. i am not sure what that means.
when we went up, he has already prepared the machine and in five minutes time we started the session. the first sixty seconds is always tough. my phone wasn't cooperating with me so i really couldn't listen to my music using my earphones. kuya ding, monette and nosh had to endure listening to the carpenter's 'merry christmas darling' five or six times. after a few minutes, i couldn't feel anything on the right side of my body anymore and wasn't distracted by the humming of the tattoo machine. it meant one thing - i was free. free from nervousness, free from the daunting sound emanating from that machine, free from pain. i suddenly remembered a friend of mine asking me a few weeks back: 'why do you look forward to pain?' my only retort was: 'because it is real.'
my session lasted about an hour and ten or fifteen minutes while nosh' tattoo was done in a mere fourty-five. and that i think is totally unfair. ahaha. but the thing is, once you have started getting the tattoo, no matter how queasy or painful it gets, you don't want to be asking the artist to stop...because that would mean you'll just be prolonging your agony. so more than anything, if you are planning to get inked, the one thing you should have a lot of is courage, or strength of will. because once you are there, there is no going back.
for some twisted, weird reason i always feel 'different' - emerging from the whole ordeal. somehow i feel empowered and i feel like nothing can break me. nosh said i looked like i will break the jaw of the next person who'd mess with me - now that i have tattoos on both my shoulderblades.
aside from the sporadic lashing kuya ding got from me (i think i yelled 'that's my shoulderblade' more than twice at the onset of our session), i feel really happy about the outcome. when you get inked, you somehow surrender a huge part of you to the one who will brand you - there has to be trust, and that factor of the relationship cannot be breached.
kuya ding did a really nice job and though my wound hasn't fully healed, i am already thinking of this backpiece that i would like for him to do. on the other hand, before we left the shop, he quipped that it'd be nice if i'll get a sleeve.
hmmm...let's see about that.
*i will try to post the pictures we took of that day on my blog, if i don't succeed, you can always view them on my facebook.
after brunch, we hailed a cab and went straight to recto, manila. i don't even remember the last time i was in that place. not much has changed - there's still a lot of people, the pollution worsened (i think) and national bookstore in avenida is still alive! i like going to that place because you can really find a lot of good books there - which, for some reason, makes me think not a lot of people in that area likes to read.
anyway, the very reason we went there is because nosh and i have been itching to get a mandala etched on our back. it has been two years since nosh last had a tattoo and almost six months for me. and i tell you, nothing excites me more than the idea of paying someone to inflict pain on me (i don't care if that particular statement did not come out right. you are all free to take it any which way you want to ahaha).
we met ding fernandez, tattoo artist extraordinaire. he was highly recommended by monette (and has done three of her five tattoos) so i figured this is the best time to try the merchandise (the merchandise being kuya ding ahaha). the studio's squeaky clean. as someone who digs the art of tattooing, the very first thing i check is just how clean the place is. nothing to worry in that department, he's a member of philtag and has won numerous awards in various competitions including the most recent dutdutan festival.
before i sat down to get my tattoo, i had to kill the nerves and went down for a quick smoke - which translates to a cup of coke and three cigarettes. it is an odd and funny thing, to still feel the jitters each and everytime i get inked. i am not sure what that means.
when we went up, he has already prepared the machine and in five minutes time we started the session. the first sixty seconds is always tough. my phone wasn't cooperating with me so i really couldn't listen to my music using my earphones. kuya ding, monette and nosh had to endure listening to the carpenter's 'merry christmas darling' five or six times. after a few minutes, i couldn't feel anything on the right side of my body anymore and wasn't distracted by the humming of the tattoo machine. it meant one thing - i was free. free from nervousness, free from the daunting sound emanating from that machine, free from pain. i suddenly remembered a friend of mine asking me a few weeks back: 'why do you look forward to pain?' my only retort was: 'because it is real.'
my session lasted about an hour and ten or fifteen minutes while nosh' tattoo was done in a mere fourty-five. and that i think is totally unfair. ahaha. but the thing is, once you have started getting the tattoo, no matter how queasy or painful it gets, you don't want to be asking the artist to stop...because that would mean you'll just be prolonging your agony. so more than anything, if you are planning to get inked, the one thing you should have a lot of is courage, or strength of will. because once you are there, there is no going back.
for some twisted, weird reason i always feel 'different' - emerging from the whole ordeal. somehow i feel empowered and i feel like nothing can break me. nosh said i looked like i will break the jaw of the next person who'd mess with me - now that i have tattoos on both my shoulderblades.
aside from the sporadic lashing kuya ding got from me (i think i yelled 'that's my shoulderblade' more than twice at the onset of our session), i feel really happy about the outcome. when you get inked, you somehow surrender a huge part of you to the one who will brand you - there has to be trust, and that factor of the relationship cannot be breached.
kuya ding did a really nice job and though my wound hasn't fully healed, i am already thinking of this backpiece that i would like for him to do. on the other hand, before we left the shop, he quipped that it'd be nice if i'll get a sleeve.
hmmm...let's see about that.
*i will try to post the pictures we took of that day on my blog, if i don't succeed, you can always view them on my facebook.
overtake
here among the ruins of darkness
my unsteady hands revel the laughter
emerging from your lips and nothing
helps - save the insanity of being lost
in a moment with you - the ache, the thorn,
the dream, the hope and the light
that pursed itself within the naked hours
consumed by you - an unaltered muse
of silence and dust, my heart heaving with
desire to be ravaged and annihilated
over and over again, the night folds onto
a crescendo of tears and unspoken words
my heartbeat entombed, my blood pulsates
as the moon hides the gaze of clouds waving
in the distance - the long, lonely stretch
that covers now and today, you and me.
for calliope
my unsteady hands revel the laughter
emerging from your lips and nothing
helps - save the insanity of being lost
in a moment with you - the ache, the thorn,
the dream, the hope and the light
that pursed itself within the naked hours
consumed by you - an unaltered muse
of silence and dust, my heart heaving with
desire to be ravaged and annihilated
over and over again, the night folds onto
a crescendo of tears and unspoken words
my heartbeat entombed, my blood pulsates
as the moon hides the gaze of clouds waving
in the distance - the long, lonely stretch
that covers now and today, you and me.
for calliope
suns and stars
my soul falls silent, the depth of that
which i cannot fathom swallows me
this story taking its space in the
crowded chambers of remembering
the bittersweet hours i spent lying
in your arms
gazing at a shooting star in this
dense, dark, betraying night
mending the solace so i may find
you in it again
and offer you my heart,
precariously needing to be
the one that breathes for you in
this solitude
the one drenched by the stillness of
chasing your voice
long after you have uttered your
goodbye.
which i cannot fathom swallows me
this story taking its space in the
crowded chambers of remembering
the bittersweet hours i spent lying
in your arms
gazing at a shooting star in this
dense, dark, betraying night
mending the solace so i may find
you in it again
and offer you my heart,
precariously needing to be
the one that breathes for you in
this solitude
the one drenched by the stillness of
chasing your voice
long after you have uttered your
goodbye.
shut
this soul unravelling
the chaos brought by the
distance and the clouds
mystefied by the songs
you hum in the midst of
senselessness, yearning to be
the one you seek when
the night breaks and the
darkness wraps everything
in oblivion, aching to be
the electric blue that tremble
when you shut your eyes
to imagine serendipity.
the chaos brought by the
distance and the clouds
mystefied by the songs
you hum in the midst of
senselessness, yearning to be
the one you seek when
the night breaks and the
darkness wraps everything
in oblivion, aching to be
the electric blue that tremble
when you shut your eyes
to imagine serendipity.
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