allow me to do this. before i head to slumber, before i close my eyes as the light of day fades, before i surrender the last, painful vision i had of you ~ when you were walking away from where i was standing ~ and give it up for the sake of the peace and silence of my thoughts.
and even when that was one of the most agonizing moments i have ever been in ~ i would take it, put myself through it, if it means discerning how much love i have for you. and most importantly, if it means taking that train ride, that journey with you every single day.
i have always believed that everything we encounter is a metaphor to a life we could or we might lead. that sooner or later, fate would unveil what role these encounters or experiences play in the grand scheme of things.
the road toward you was long and the pavement was covered with broken glass and thorns. but let me tell you that there has never been a day i looked back to the last three months of my life with regret or sadness. i am glad i chose to walk on the path that led me to you because i disproved my own feelings of being inadequate or being temporary. it taught me one thing: the reality of how much more i can offer. and i can and I am willing to give so much more than what both my hands can contain at a single moment ~ and if there will ever be a time i would lose sight of myself, i want to find you there, aching to hold me close to tell me that you would want to help me rediscover the things i am passionate about, that you would want to be there to witness how i’d renew my faith in us, in you, in all that we have been through, in the things that remain intangible but keep in flourishing because we both have poured so much of who we are to what we have.
as i have said once, i know that this is not about doing what would please others, it is about going after what we want because we understand that we begin to die the very second we start denying ourselves the chance to be happy. you said that the most important thing is you and me. and somehow that gives me comfort. knowing that i am wanted and needed by the same person i want to give all my life to. i couldn’t have been luckier, i couldn’t have been more fortunate. there was never a day i did not stop for a moment to thank Him for entrusting you to me. i did pray for this, i did pray for you ~ that if you needed something to believe in, i hope He would allow me to show you that some things do last, if we do not doubt the cause, the reason why you and i are here now.
and the reason is because we were searching for meaning and found each other. thank you for each day you give me. i love you as ever.
0 comments:
Post a Comment