eros the bittersweet

i am with you

I write to you now because I know that the worst part is over. I write to you now because you are all I can think of.

I write to you now because I want to take you back to the beginning.

To our beginning.

I want for you to remember the moments when my breath was halted because you are too near. I remember the instances when your absence crippled my hope – all because I want so much to be around you – I want so much to have you around.

And now, after a year and a half – I know that both of us will be counting the days of all the years that we will spend with each other. I know that both of us will have nothing but faith and optimism for the lifetime that we will share.

You are the very reason why I am here. The cause why I know there is nothing that I cannot survive. You are all that I hold that I know keeps me strong. It is your love that lifts the gloom out of a moment – your love that gives me back all that I have offered and given.

It is you, my love that makes me believe in fate. The chances, the randomness of all that which exists…somehow worked together in my favor. You are with me, and I am grateful that the universe allowed me to cross your path.

You are the light that breaks the darkness in me. You are the smile that lingers when I could not help but frown. Yours is the image that remains even when my eyes filter the pain of being apart from you. You are all that I need. You are everything that I want in this life.

You are everything that keeps me hopeful about this life. We both have gone through so much, we both have been dragged by the weight of the things that shook us. I say, the things that shook us. We are not changed by the demons that we have to confront every day. If anything, because of these same nightmares, we realize the fortitude that our heart holds. We are not changed by them because we refuse to be. We should never allow troubles to sink too deep.

I will never allow anything to change me – because I have you to think of now. Most importantly, I have you to love.


And I want to tell you that I will try to be strong enough for us both. So that you can rest your heart in my hand – and feel that I will remain with you. That I will weather the odds – no matter how cruel they may be.

I will stay with you because I understand what it meant to have followed you. I will stay with you because I know what it means to keep the one that allows me to breathe. I will remain because of you. I do not have any other reason but you.

So let me take your hand, in your journey to rediscovering the things that make you real. Let me be with you as you tread the path back to who you really are.

Let me offer you a new page, a new start, a new day. Let me offer you, my heart and my life, my understanding and my compassion, my fire and my delight – for I, at last, have realized that our beginning is a gift.

And to be with you is to triumph in reliving the moments that made ‘us.’

0 comments:

 

anais nin

and the day came when the risk to remain tight in the bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

t.s. eliot

i should have been a pair of ragged claws.

frida kahlo

i hope the exit is joyful and i hope never to return.